You see, you do not succeed - let me do it
You can’t say that to a child otherwise you can completely discourage his habit of doing something on his own. After all, the child is still too small to quickly cope with different tasks, whether to remove toys or to fasten a button on clothes.
If the mother does not allow the child to do such difficult things on her own, the child will soon stop doing them himself. What for? After all, mom will do everything for him.
Hold on, don't shout
Not every woman can easily withstand the cry of her child when he demands something. But with this phrase, mothers achieve only one thing, the child will manipulate you and will always achieve his cry and cry. Here it is necessary to firmly answer “no” so that the child understands that it’s impossible to help with a whining.
I'll give you to someone else's uncle
In a child, such words cause bouts of horror, because the baby does not know that you just scare him. Thus, the child may develop fear of the rest of the world. Also, do not scare the child with a monster under the bed. In the world there are many cases where children were so afraid of non-existent monsters that in adulthood they can not get rid of a phobia.
It is better to tell the child "sleep baby, because as soon as in a dream magic fairies come to you."
But the neighbor girl (boy) is not like you ...
Mom wanted to say this phrase so that the child looks at the good behavior of other children and does the same. But the child interprets his mother’s words differently. He thinks that you do not love him, but love those children from a neighboring yard. Such children can become inactive and do not aspire to anything.
It is necessary to be able and in time to encourage the child. For example, buying a toy that he had long wanted. But with this you do not need to go too far so that he does not wait for a new purchase after each of his actions.
You're killing me!
Children tend to believe in everything their parents say. And if mom said such a thing, then the child thinks that he can really hurt mom. From here begin anxieties, fears, as well as a restless sleep at night. Instead of this phrase, you can tell the child the truth. Like you came home from work and tired, and the child screams loudly. Tell him that mom is tired and he should be quiet.
If a child indulges, say that such behavior upsets and upsets you. Do not be afraid to talk about your feelings, because only then will the child be able to understand what inconvenience he causes to you with his behavior.
Because I said so!
Many children come across this phrase at different ages. The child interprets them in his head as that he will never be able to prove anything to his mother. Most often, such children are sure that their mother does not hear them and they completely close from her.
So it turns out that the children stop being independent, because they know that in case of failure or good luck, mother will still say her own phrase. And here it’s worth talking with the child and explaining what he did wrong so that he understood what his mistake was.
Here is your brother ... your sister ...
Such words always hurt the child, because he regards it as "I love your brother or sister more than you."In no case can two children be compared, this will only aggravate the situation, and the child will receive complexes. Especially between children there may be quarrels and rivalry for the mother’s love.
You always ... you never ...
Such phrases the child immediately perceives on his own account that he is bad. In other words, such phrases stick to the child like a label, and he can no longer or does not want to remove it.
For example, a child always forgets to put away toys or does it very slowly. Do not say here "you never clean them after yourself." It will always be better to come up with a child motivation. For example, "do not forget to clean up the toys with you, because at the end of the week I will bring you a surprise for this."
You can do better!
And here, it would seem that this is there, but not. The child again hears the phrase in his own way - "again, I did not succeed." Imagine how a child was preparing for a particular event and did not reach the first place or did not receive the highest score. And here you are with your phrase, you kill in him the last desire for efforts and actions. What for? If mom will not be enough all the time.
What grade your child has not brought from school, always praise him, be positive, even if the grade is too small. It is worth motivating the child, and not reproach him.
You must understand that ...
Such moralizing never affects children. The child perceives all your reasonable arguments and arguments as a boring speech, which would soon end. He does not listen at all to what you are saying, all the more so it is not possible to demand from him any action at all.
Always give your child a break from the problem that has arisen. Problem, situation or disagreement at school - you need to give a break so that the child comes to a quiet standing. Then the information will be absorbed by his head more easily. When the time comes, talk to him about what happened and talk only about this problem. Do not load the child at once and all, but speak with clear and understandable phrases.
